Crocodile in my pants

As a youth I watched a lot of satruday afternoon specials starring Johnny Wiesmueller. For those of you unfamiliar with the seventies and having only one channel, not because you didn't have cable but because there was only one channel.....yeah one! The best part was KVOS only played reruns from the fifties. Only now are they playing what I would have liked to have been watching almost thirty years ago. I wanted to be Tarzan but alas, I soon realized I lacked the physical prowess and jungle knowledge of the Lord of the apes. I also lacked golm medals in olympic swimming, I was six, sue me. So I decided being a zoo keeper was the way to go. I would run the zoo and all the animals would be my friends and if anyone I didn't like bothered me I would yodel ahhhh ah aha ah ahahhhhhhhhhh and elephants and monkeys would come out of nowhere and trample my enemies. I had big dreams. Then one horrible night all those dreams were crushed. While camping with two of my older cousins I was told that zoo keepers are not lords of their domain and ruler of the beasts but people who clean up animal poo poo.
For the next several years I refused to believe. Eventually with age I gave up the dream of zookeeperdom and wanted to be a biologist. They studied animals, they must be like the Tarzan of the educational kingdom. Wrong again. to be con't........